In order to become the person you want to become — someone who lives with integrity, someone who lives with confidence, someone who is faithful to the people that matter to them — you should focus on the daily process you follow, not the end product you achieve. Because the life you have today is, essentially, the sum (result) of your habits. So if you want to change your life, you’ll want to start by making good habits and breaking the bad ones. How do I do that, Robert?
Well, I believe if someone wants to change their habits, they should focus on adopting and maintaining good habits, instead of focusing on getting rid of the bad ones. You should start replacing your bad habits with good ones. Many people have achieved more in the process of mastering their habits by working on creating healthy habits which would eventually replace the old ones, rather than struggling to break the unhealthy ones. There’s two ways to do this: let’s say someone wants to break the habit of chewing on their pencils. One way to do this is by replacing the object of the bad habit with a good one – for instance, have some carrot sticks at hand whenever you’re going to use a pencil and start chewing those carrots instead. This way you avoid destroying your gums and teeth and you’re also having a healthy snack (hehe).
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The other way to replace the bad habit of chewing your pencils is by choosing a substitute for your bad habit itself. You need to have a plan ahead of time for how you will respond when you face the stress or boredom that prompts your bad habit. For instance, whenever you have to write by using a pencil, choose to type on a computer instead. Whatever you choose to do, it’s all about making small adjustments. One way to do this is by setting rules for yourself. These decisions that we have made in advance for our own good are called “second-order decisions”, according to psychologists. For example: Make a rule to stand up and move away from your desk every 60 minutes. Decide to check your Facebook only 3 times a day.
When you start setting rules like those, they can make a huge difference in your life by increasing your productivity, peace and even health. You’ll soon find that you won’t need these rules anymore because they’ve become habits incorporated in your everyday life. So think about some rules you could set for yourself in order to improve your everyday life, your relationships, your work environment. By setting rules like those you end up having to make fewer decisions, which leads to more positive change, a clear mind and a more relaxed lifestyle.